I dreamt a wonderful horrible beautiful dream. I was a teacher on a safari with a group of 13-14 year old kids. We swam across a huge alligator infested lake because there was no other way to get across it. Once ashore we climbed up a giant embankment and found ourselves at a trail head. While some of the children ran ahead I stayed behind with some of the girls. Out of nowhere, a massive male lion jumped out ahead near the other children. Instantly, me and the girls scrambled up a vine, which swayed side to side because we were too heavy, while the lions circled us on ground. Somehow I ended up in a house trying to escape a particularly large male lion. As I ran into a bathroom and shut the door, he was right there busting through the doorway. I hopped in the bathtub, no where else to go. Fear overcame my body and mind. I instantly imagined what it was going to be like when he was on top of me tearing me limb from limb- and not having the strength to push him off. I was paralyzed with fear as I imagined what it would really feel like to be eaten alive, what it would really feel like to die this way. I started shaking uncontrollably.
The lion slowly walked over and got in the tub with me. I thought “this is it”. He lay next to me, almost like we were spooning. I held my breath. I felt his massive furry heavy head sink between the space of my head and shoulder, and then- he started licking me furiously. Just like a cat would who was cleaning their young.
I started laughing and he made a noise like he was laughing too.
So, just so we’re clear: a 15-year-old who had unprotected sex and knows that she doesn’t want to be a mom is too immature to follow the directions on the box, but mature enough to birth and raise a baby?
“You know the typical crowd, “Wow, it’s Friday night, what are you going to do? Just sit there?” Well, yeah. Because there’s nothing out there. It’s stupidity. Stupid people mingling with stupid people. Let them stupidify themselves. I’ve never been bothered with the need to rush out into the night. That’s all. Sorry for all the millions, but I’ve never been lonely. I like myself. I’m the best form of entertainment I have.”—Charles Bukowski (via which-witch)